February 2012
1 tag
jackwebsterbitches:
i just want to fall asleep and never wake up sometimes
1 tag
on my first day of work at mcdonalds a little girl came in with her dad and when i asked what she wanted she told me the party pack 50 piece chicken mcnugget and her dad was like no sweetheart you cant eat that much and she screamed YOU UNDERESTIMATE MY ABILITIES and then kicked her dad in the balls and he fell to the floor and she was only like 6 years old omg
neneleakesweave:
wow those leggings really compliment the outline of your vagina
fagjars:
all of the other sperm must have been really retarded if i’m the idiot that won
1 tag
bumpin-pretties:
that awkward moment when you’re making out with someone and they go to undo your zipper and instead of genitals there is actually a huge, gaping black hole that instantaneously sucks both of you into a void and jesus is there and he tells you not to have sex before marriage.
nicolascagemymuse:
If Steve Tyler and Mick Jagger had a baby it’d just be one giant mouth.
boy: what's your name so i can look you up on facebook?
girl: Jasmine AlwaysSwaggin'NoMattaWat Jones
bawbag:
Has anyone else noticed that the symbol “&” looks like a man dragging his butt across the floor?
snoipahkat:
tyrawanks:
seriously what is the point of fonts like wingdings
who actually understands square airplane banana cross dash bicycle smiley face
WHAT DID YOU JUST CALL ME
sifuhotmen:
magic conch will i ever be a quality blog
