March 2012
2 tags
godh8sfags:
I always thought in Baby Got Back, the lyrics were “I like big butts in the candlelight”
me: i'm cold
guys: shut up and stop complaining
pretty girl: i'm cold
guys: here take my jacket you beautiful little thing let's cuddle to transfer some heat to your precious little body so you don't get frostbite oh dear lord let this child be warm
mjolkk:
oh my god i’m at the grocery store and there is a guy in the frozen section who is tweaked off his balls on some kind hallucinatory drug.
i’m in the next isle meowing softly through the cereal boxes where he can’t see me and he is losing his shit pulling pizza boxes out of the freezers and yelling that he needs to save the popsicle cat
am i a bad person
1 tag
Watchrenagerie:
HIS SMILE AT THE END
1 tag
February 2012
1 tag
jackwebsterbitches:
i just want to fall asleep and never wake up sometimes
1 tag
on my first day of work at mcdonalds a little girl came in with her dad and when i asked what she wanted she told me the party pack 50 piece chicken mcnugget and her dad was like no sweetheart you cant eat that much and she screamed YOU UNDERESTIMATE MY ABILITIES and then kicked her dad in the balls and he fell to the floor and she was only like 6 years old omg
neneleakesweave:
wow those leggings really compliment the outline of your vagina
fagjars:
all of the other sperm must have been really retarded if i’m the idiot that won
1 tag
